An acquaintance from a place I used to visit frequently recently shared the heartbreaking news that he had lost his father. I didn’t know the details of his loss, and our conversation was brief, but the pain in his eyes was unmistakable. To be honest, I’ve never been particularly fond of this person, but grief—especially the kind that follows the loss of a loved one—is not something I would wish upon anyone. Reflecting on this encounter, I couldn’t help but think about the expression in my own eyes when I informed friends of my mom’s passing. While I can’t say for certain what my expression was, I imagine the sadness mirrored what I saw in his.
It’s been over seven years since I lost my mom, and as I think of her today, I find myself drawn to a song she loved: My Heart Will Go On by Céline Dion. This iconic ballad, released in 1997, is widely known as the theme of Titanic. Though I don’t think it was my mom’s favorite song, I do know she preferred Céline Dion’s English songs over her French ones. Sadly, I’ll never be able to ask her which song she loved most.
This realization—that there are countless things I’ll never know about her—hits hard. We so easily take the people in our lives for granted, often overlooking what truly matters. Not all relationships with parents or family are perfect, and some are undeniably fraught. But for many of us, the bonds we share are better than we might admit. And yet, we still fail to fully appreciate what our loved ones do for us.
Are We Guilty of Taking Our Parents for Granted?
I was guilty of this. I treated my parents’ sacrifices as if they were natural, expected. Even into adulthood, I often failed to respect them as they deserved. My struggles with drinking delayed my emotional growth, leaving me in a state of arrested development until well into my late twenties. Now that I’ve finally awakened from that haze, I see how much time I wasted—time that could have been spent truly knowing my mom.
We often lament that our parents don’t understand us, but do we take the time to understand them? As children, it’s not our role to regulate our parents’ emotions or take on their burdens. However, as adults, shouldn’t we approach our relationships with greater empathy and effort?
What Does “My Heart Will Go On” Teach Us About Loss?
The theme of My Heart Will Go On is an enduring love that transcends death. While it speaks to the romantic tragedy of Titanic, its message is universal—it resonates with anyone who has lost a parent, sibling, or close friend. Time is fleeting, and every moment we fail to cherish is a moment we’ll never get back.
It may sound cliché, but the philosophy of Carpe Diem—to seize the day—holds profound truth. Likewise, the Latin concept of Memento Mori, the reminder of our own mortality, encourages us to value the time we have and the connections we nurture.
Can Empathy Bridge the Gaps in Our Relationships?
Our childhood experiences lay the foundation for our adult lives. While this doesn’t mean we need to excuse harmful behavior, it can help us view others—including our parents—with greater understanding and compassion. We’re often quick to judge others by our own standards, forgetting our own flaws and how our actions may appear from their perspective.
Life is brief. With billions of people on this planet, living in harmony with everyone may seem like an impossible goal, but it begins with harmony within ourselves. If we can achieve that inner peace, it will inevitably guide us to act with kindness and empathy toward others.
What do you think? Have you had moments of realization about your relationships, or a song that brought clarity to your emotions? Let’s discuss—leave a comment and share your thoughts!
#tales-posts
Leave a Reply